You've Got Issues

You’ve Got Issues: Stefan

Over here on the You’ve Got Issues site, we focus on how you’ve got issues. That’s right, readers, we’re talking about you! With that in mind, every week we select one of you to spotlight. This week’s special guest: Stefan.

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NAME: Stefan

WHAT IS YOUR PETTIEST ISSUE?

Dating site profiles that insist on a guy being taller drive me crazy.

 WHEN DID YOU FIRST NOTICE YOU HAD IT?

I first noticed this really bothered me sometime early last year. It was subtle at first, but after weeding through a seemingly endless stream of “matches” where this caveat kept appearing, I had finally had enough. At that point, it became a full fledged rant worthy issue in my mind.  

HOW OFTEN DOES IT COME UP?

I run into this daily when I’m using any form of online dating service. The only way to avoid it is to switch to dating the old fashioned way. Some days I handle it better than others, probably depending on how much emphasis in on that one feature.

HOW LONG DOES YOUR FRUSTRATION WITH IT TEND  TO LAST?

The underlying frustration never really goes away. The more immediate and intense frustration fades soon after I turn my attention to something else.

HAS YOUR FRUSTRATION WITH THIS GOTTEN BETTER  OR WORSE OVER TIME?

There is no question this has gotten worse for me the more I encounter it and the more I think about it.

WHAT DO YOU THINK IS BEHIND OR UNDERNEATH IT?

The obvious initial underlying cause is that I am below average in height (5’6″), which means that I am the subject of this exclusion more often than other people. I try to just let it go and move on, but I find the process of online dating so difficult to begin with it kills me when I find a promising profile only to be shot down before I even have a chance to respond.

I have a difficult time trying to understand why this one issue is a deal-breaker for so many women when it seems inconsequential to me. I would love to sit down and just ask them directly, but that just doesn’t seem possible. Online dating is a numbers game and I can’t imagine it would be to my benefit to immediately criticize someone’s preference. I don’t want to be disrespectful and contact someone when they have a clearly stated requirement either.

DO YOU LOVE PEANUT BUTTER?

Is this a trick question? Who doesn’t love peanut butter?

What’s your take on Stefan’s issues? Relate? Don’t relate? Share your thoughts as a comment!

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